Raise Your Hands if You Have Flappys

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Raise your hands if you have flappys!

Well… maybe not

Let’s start with some definitions:

Gordita – ‘cute, little fat girl’ in spanish – commonly used by boyfriends for their girlfriends as a nice thing to say rather than an insult

Flappys – Excessive arm skin or arm fat that hangs down when arms are raised

Got it? OK, here we go…   Hi, my name is Amy and I’m a gordita with flappys.

Seems like I read everyday about body acceptance. It’s a welcome and refreshing view of gorditas and other human shapes and sizes.

Many awesome women are blogging, writing, and talking about body acceptance, the beauty of fleshy rolls, and the right to bare arms. But here’s the deal; These are young women… that is, their bodies might be roly and poly but it’s a younger, firmer roly and poly 🙂     I bet they don’t have the beautiful, lush, flag-waving-in-the-breeze-flappy arms that I have!

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Summer is a love/hate for me… love the gorgeous bare shoulder fashions – hate to accessorize those nice looks with my flappys.

IMO tan flappys look a little better than bright white ones, so come Summer I throw my arms in the air like I don’t care (in the privacy of my own front patio) and try to get a little color on the flaps. Also I’ve started doing planks to improve all over muscle tone, especially flappys… but probably should have started last Fall, or 2015.

Until the tan and planks take huge effect, I incorporate shrugs, shawls, etc into my everyday outfits. But those can be hot-flash-inducing and the fullness is overly fussy sometimes. 

A few years back I bought a Rhonda Shear arm shaper… it was way too spandex-y and OMG! My arms looked like stuffed sausages in a flesh-colored casing!  SO. GROSS.

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I never sausage a thing!

 

A quick Google search reveals several newer, more attractive (?) and innovative ideas for re-shaping/covering flappys. Let’s take a look at some advances in Flappy coverage:

Skinnies Instant Lifts. “These fabulous clear adhesives can be strategically and secretly placed to tuck, lift and contour your body. Use as non surgical solution to instantly lift and tighten saggy upper arms. Hides discreetly so no one will know but you. As seen on Shark Tank, Rachael Ray Show, Today Show, HSN, QVC & More!”

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It’s the removal that kills ya!

HaHa! These are basically a big-ass piece of tape that pulls your skin tight – geez, are we (me) that obsessed?! And can I get one for my chin also?   Hmmmm.. I do have a roll of clear contact paper, I wonder if strips of that would work?  I PROMISE if I try contact paper I will take photos and post it #quicklyreachingtheageofnoshame

 

Sleevy Wonders “Covering up with a sweater or jacket often provokes a hot flash, or hides the beautiful look of a dress… needed: independent, interchangeable sleeves that slim arms without making us too hot or ruining the look of cute outfits!” Exactly! See? They totally get it! These are actually cute and wearable – AND easily wins the award for best-name – Sleevy Wonders appear to hit all the right notes (sorry, I couldn’t resist)  BUT they start at about $50 per pair. So NOPE, probably not for me.   Soy una gordita tocaña.  $$$

 

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“Don’t You Worry ‘Bout A Thing” Sleevy Wonders got ya covered. For $55-85. 

 

Tattoo Sleeve Covers  Designed to cover tattoos, available in many colors. These look like ‘thigh-highs’ for arms. $11.95/pair  Screen Shot 2017-07-15 at 4.45.33 PM

I might actually try these sometime, for a casual look. Between October and April. Lots of color choices and the fabric is cotton-y, hopefully avoiding the sausage result as before.



O. M. G. THIS had never occurred to me!  I would try these for sure!

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For those special family events- weddings, funerals, graduations etc 🙂

I love these! Anyone want split an order and share-wear with me?!


 

I saw a quote:  “Never wave goodbye in the summer after 35”

That just seems so unfriendly. 

Amy is not quite ready to embrace the flappys

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Design of the Day: A T-shirt Primer

Resistance Pies is my T-shirt company. I design the graphics and sell them from my store ResistancePies.biz 

This started out a few years ago with a design showing off Austin’s weirdness – Every year in November people here start decorating the cedar trees along Hwy 360 with holiday decorations. It started years ago with one tree decorated by one family – they did it in honor of their son who had passed away earlier in the year. It was sweet and lovely.

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I guess lots of people loved this idea, because every year there are more, and More, and MORE (like almost all cool things in ATX – it has become a victim of its own self… another post on that later)

ANYWAY… four (?) years ago I designed a T-shirt in honor of this decorated Christmas Tree phenomenon – I titled it “AUSTIN TREE-60”   Is that clever, or what?

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I sold T’s on the side of the road in front of the trees… It was a fun way to be creative, acknowledge my favorite city, and make a few extra bucks for Christmas.

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Fun until I fell down the hillside of trees and tore my meniscus. Then it was no fun. 

Since then I designed T’s here and there, mostly for myself, usually with sarcastic or sly phrases…

ZOOM ahead to January 20, 2017 – or D (for dumbass) Day. The emperor-wannabe was sworn in and my depression got really real, yo. Eventually I realized that tapping into my creative self was a way to lift the dark clouds a little.

 

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Then…. Ta-Da! With help from my awesome (and equally disturbed) gal pal,  Jean, Resistance Pies T-Shirt Co. was born!  

Stay tuned to see a featured T on Mondays, and visit (buy!) Resistance T-Shirts here!

Thank you for your continued support 🙂

Amy Loves Austin

Who Are These People?!

This kind of stuff cracks me up!
Who are these people saying “Every Woman Should Own a Trenchcoat” or wool pencil skirt etc… They are OBVIOUSLY not Texas girls!
[If you have and wear a wool pencil skirt please send photos; I don’t think I know anyone who does and would welcome your friendship 🙂 ]
ALSO: pencil skirt of any fabric isn’t very friendly to my super sexy and abundant belly pooch unless I team it up with peplum style top or jacket, or maybe a tunic top.
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BTW: I totally hate the Experts who make the “what a woman over 50 should not wear” lists… One “no-no” list had hoop earrings on it, REALLY?!?!  I will likely be buried in hoop earrings at age 107. I wear hoops 80% of the time and big-ass dangly earrings the rest of the time. I like hoops so much I might just wear a nose ring hoop. so there
What else is on the list? Black Bikini. Every woman should own a black bikini. hahahahahahahahaha! No further comment needed, amiright?
Next list:
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Oh good! black bikini is here, too. I like consistency in rules. 🙂
Most of the items on this list are TFE – too friggin’ expensive – yeah, buying quality is a good thing, longer lasting, re-purposable etc, but quality doesn’t have to equal extremely expensive, does it?
anyway… also on the the list:
OK, Tall riding boot (brown leather) – hmmm, I do love a tall riding boot [or any boots] and I own tall riding boots, but, alas, they’re black.
That might be strike three for me… but just for fun, lets keep going. 
Next list:
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No black bikini here and the “Classic Riding Boots” could be black, I’m liking this list! AND look! HOOP Earrings, yay!!
This is the “Ultimate Wardrobe Checklist” so if we have everything on this list we have the ultimate wardrobe, isn’t that awesome 😀 
Last one [today]
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Wardrobe Essentials for Most Boring Women in the World:
Maybe I would look all ooh-la-la French Woman Chic, and that is a gorgeous look, for chic French women, but I’m a Gordita!
The neutral colors are so blah… and there’s the damn pencil skirt again. NOPE.
Amy Loves being told what to wear… haha!

Carolina League

“Isn’t this a little much for the Carolina Leagues?”

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A favorite line from a favorite movie –  “Bull Durham”

During one of the many conversations between my feminist hero Annie Savoy and Crash Davis, he asks her:

“Who are you?  Do you have a job?” and then (referring to her cute white midriff top, short black skirt and garters/stockings peeping out) he says: 

“Isn’t this a little much for the Carolina Leagues?”

HAHA! I often ask myself that when I get dressed… “is this too much? can I wear this? …”

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Note the Cons and white socks she wears in these photos… perfection with HER pencil skirt… I would wear A-line!  #lifegoals

Amy loves Bull Durham!

#Belly Pooch

FUN color combo and maxi-skirt look.
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Black, white a red… always a great combination!
Not a fan of the stripes wrapping around my bellypooch tho –
A printed anything hides pooch much better.
B/W printed maxi would be so cute here, not too full though!
Printed pencil skirt would be awesome, too, but, for me, would require longer top so I wouldn’t fidget all day.
When I wear something that I don’t feel great in I fidget with my clothes –
Terrible and totally unprofessional… I tell myself “don’t fidget, don’t fidget, DON’T just DON’T”
but it doesn’t really help… I defy myself and do it anyway.
This original look used a black shirt with white trim…
I like solid black top (way more versatile) with a chunky white necklace, not too short. 
T-straps elongate stub-legs… always nice 🙂
Amy loves Red, White and Black
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Celebrate! 30 Year Class Reunion… [ I can’t possibly be that old!? ]

OK, this made me LOL!

My 35 year Class Reunion is coming up and I came across this old post (June 17, 2011) on Polyvore… It’s my wardrobe “plan” for the 30 Reunion Weekend 5 years ago!! I say “plan” because I never owned these clothes – it was more like a wishlist. Sadly it still is, ha!

Guess I’ll try it again for the 35 Reunion – no one will remember, lol!

Here’s the original editorial – with 2016 notes:

“This is what I would like to wear to my 30 Year Class Reunion (read: gossipweekend.) Since I don’t have all of these items, will have to get creative! This is still true :/

 Friday is a Family Bowling Night (AKA stand in the bar drinking and laughing Night) so the denim skirt is actually a skort, in case I actually bowl. Hmm…. Well, OK, no skort, but I do have a very cute denim skirt with a flounce hem, maybe I’ll wear it. Get ready people, you’ll be seeing my panties if I bowl.

It’s usually cold at Dart Bowl, so I’ve added a darling cropped cardi in my favorite color. Damn! I STILL seriously need a darling, pink cropped cardigan. Why have I not bought one?!?!


 
I deserve a darling pink cardigan.
I am worthy of a darling pink cardigan.
A darling pink cardigan will soon come into my life… Hahaha!
 
 

Saturday night party is at an open-air bar downtown ATX. The air temp will be about 105 degrees (really) SO I am going for a cool, thin dress with pettipants under for the chub rub(!) and a super light-weight shrug to cover my flappy arms…

 Flappy Arms! Some things never change! Dancing and flappy arms really DO NOT mix…  I have been trying to get a little bit of tan on my flappys so they’re not glow-in-the-dark-white. Are slightly tan flappys better than white flappys?! This is need to know

Back to the dress: I have two maxi dresses to choose from… turquoise pattern or dark pink pattern? Probably turquoise, I already have killer turquoise platforms to wear.

 Sunday is mexican brunch for families. Same pink cardigan but with vintage rock n roll T and my fave pink Converse sneaks. Yay! This I can do, I have the same pink Cons as 5 years ago AND a newish pair, so the weekend will be ALL GOOD, haha! Woohoo!

 Amy Loves Cons!

 


Original Post:
6-17-11

This is what I would like to wear to my 30 year reunion this weekend. Since I don’t have all of these items, will have to get creative!
Friday is a Family Bowling night, so the denim skirt is actually a skort :-)   It’s usually cold in the Bowling Alley, so I’ve added a darling cropped cardi in my favorite color!
Saturday is at a bar downtown. It’s an open- air bar and the air temp will be about 102 degrees (really) SO I am going for a cool, thin dress with pettipants under for the chub rub(!) and a super light-weight shrug to cover my flappy arms.
Sunday is mexican brunch for families. Same pink cardigan but with vintage rock n roll T and my fave pink Converse sneaks.
“We raise hell, we have FUN, we’re the Class of 81!”

Bad Hair Day

Have I mentioned before that I love Austin?!

Well… I am not crazy about the Austin weather … after months of scorching hot Summer and no rain:

Today, November 7 is muggy and gross.

I have a lot of hair, it’s thick, and unfortunately,  neither curly nor straight.  On muggy days like this, if I shampoo in the morning, my hair will stay damp all friggin’ day.  And it will get bigger and bigger and fuzzier and frizzier and yet, somehow, still be flat… WTH??

So, I am done with my ‘office’ work and am heading out into the muggy forbook deliveries and Teacher visits, and my hair will get there before I do.

Amy hates muggy weather – even in Austin.